King of the Groves

Today I’m getting two cortisone shots. One in each knee. I think the young doctor likes me, because I am an old jock with a seemingly high tolerance for pain.  I don’t complain.

I’m what orthopedic doctors commonly refer to as a “four joint guy.”  This means I will need to eventually have both knees and hips replaced. I had my left hip replaced a little over a year ago.  The plan was to replace my right hip next, but my right knee has become so bad, he wants to move it to the top of the list now. 

There seems to be two dominant philosophies on our relationships with our bodies: your body is a temple, or your body is an amusement park. I went the amusement park route, as I am confident that I wore my joints out as a long-time distance runner and soccer player over the years.  I can only imagine that my genes play a part in this equation as well, but no one knows for sure. 

People often ask me if I could do it all over again, would I still put so much pressure on my body from these physical pursuits.  My answer is always yes.  I learned so much about myself and life in general by processing the world this way, I wouldn’t change a thing. 

As the physician’s assistant plunges the first of the two shots into my right knee, I notice that there’s always a feeling of vulnerability when the needle punctures the skin. To distract myself, I think back to a time when I was a teenager at my old boarding school in Florida.  We would skip cross country practice and run off to the orange groves to play a game we called “King of the Groves.”  Typical teenage silly stuff.  We were young, strong, and fast without a single care or responsibility in the world.  We would laugh and run freely, while trying to hit each other with the oranges.  That youthful feeling of confidence and speed is something I will never forget.  The memory of the sweet scent of the oranges and the warmth of the Florida sunshine on my skin has stayed with me for decades. 

As I leave the doctor’s office and drive off, I try not to wallow in self-pity.  Any good therapist or coach (including me) would advise to “feel what you feel,” but sometimes I don’t always practice what I preach.

Heading home, I think about those times of my youth spent running in the groves. While we would all like to remain forever young and strong, I truly believe that having a life of fulfillment is about finding meaning and purpose from all of our experiences. Getting older is a privilege.  While I am grateful for the wonderful life I have now, I sometimes miss that boy. I like to imagine that he is off somewhere in the distance running quickly and freely though the groves with a huge smile on his face.

Greg Graber is an internationally respected leadership and mental performance coach who helps teams, schools, organizations, and individuals thrive under pressure. With a foundation in mindfulness-based practices, Greg teaches people how to stay grounded, focused, and resilient in fast-paced, high-stakes environments.