Be Bored

A few years ago, Dr. Nancy Collier wrote a wonderful book, The Power of Off.  She presented us with some staggering statistics:

* The average person spends more than eight hours per day on his or her phone or laptop. This is more than most of us sleep each night.

*Young adults average 110 daily texts.

*Most people check their smart phones 150 times per day.

*The average person spends thirteen hours per week checking/working on email.

*Seventy percent of children think their parents spend too much time on their devices.

*The average person spends about twelve hours per day staring at screens (phones, computers, electronic reading devices, TVs, etc.).

Some of the issues from our excessive screen use may include but are not limited to: a desynchronized body clock, altered brain chemistry, loss of focus, and raised stress hormones.

Dr. Victoria Dunckley, MD, specializes in working with children who have what is referred to as "Electronic Screen Syndrome." Some of the symptoms from this include dysregulated moods (irritable, tearful, rageful, etc.), impaired cognition (poor focus, forgetful, and disorganized), and dysfunctional behavior (oppositional, impulsive, and low empathy).

From a neurological perspective, brain scans of tech-addicted individuals reveal the extensive damage that our devices and gadgets can wreak on our brains, including gray matter atrophy, thinner cortex, white matter fragmentation, reduced dopamine (receptors and transporters), and abnormal processing. Basically, the brains of tech- addicted individuals look similar in terms of damage to the brains of people who suffer from alcohol and substance abuse.

When is the last time you just sat and did nothing? I'm not suggesting you become a sloth. I am suggesting, however, that you build in a few pockets of silence and stillness per day when you put your phone down and let yourself be bored. It seems that boredom is the great enemy in our society. Part of the reason for this is because we are not comfortable sitting along with just our thoughts and emotions. We immediately have to pull out our phones and look at social media. Sitting alone with our thoughts and emotions has its benefits. Most significantly, it will help you to improve your self-awareness. Being bored isn't a bad thing, either. Entering a state of boredom clears space in our heads. This space is where we tap into creativity and imagination. Great stuff happens here!

So the next time you are having a nice meal with your significant other, and the urge to whip out your phone and check your Facebook profile washes over you, resist the urge to do so. It's a win-win: 1. You're helping yourself stay in the present moment. 2. You are giving your mate the best possible gift ever: your full attention.

And the next time your children ask for their devices because they are “bored," say "No."  Tell them that boredom is a good thing. They may look at you like you are crazy and pitch a fit initially. However, over time, they will thank you for it.

Greg Graber is an internationally respected leadership and mental performance coach who helps teams, schools, organizations, and individuals thrive under pressure. With a foundation in mindfulness-based practices, Greg teaches people how to stay grounded, focused, and resilient in fast-paced, high-stakes environments.

His practical, science-backed approach has made him a go-to expert for elite performers across industries — from professional sports and education to healthcare, hospitality, and law enforcement